Channeling Bette Midler

I met with a friend today about his dream of writing a book. He’s an incredibly gifted physician who works with children and has one heck of a story to tell. As I walked him through some steps to take in order to make his dream a reality, I felt privileged to be able to help someone, no matter how small my contribution.

Sitting across the table from my friend and witnessing his eagerness to start something he’s always wanted to do made me feel so grateful that I took the leap and began living my dream of writing full time. I’m no where near finished with my journey, there is so much left to do and to learn, but I’m not back at the beginning where taking the first steps seemed so daunting.

I saw in his eyes what I’d seen in my own—desire, fear, apprehension—the kinds of emotions that back some people down and lift others up. I told him straight out that he had a lot of work to do and that it wouldn’t be easy. I wasn’t telling him anything he didn’t already know. A man who has worked as hard as he has and faces what he has to face every day isn’t the kind of person who’s going to back down because something is hard.

I feel like he took a real step forward today just by talking about his dream. Sometimes admitting something out loud to someone is the very thing to push a person toward his or her goal. It’s easy to walk away from a dream no one knows about but you. I wrote in secret for years and felt mortally embarrassed when either my husband or my kids told others I was writing a book. I didn’t want people asking me how it was going, when I was going to get published, when they could find my book on the shelves of the local bookstore. I was protecting my dream by not sharing it with others.

When I decided to self-publish my work, I had to let people know and in a very big way. Was I scared to put my work out there for others to judge? You better believe I was. I’m still a little bit scared. I had a very supportive group of friends who helped lift me up when I made this decision. I hope all the dreamers out there have at least one person who can make the road ahead a little less weary.

What about you? What’s your dream and who’s the wind beneath your wings?

Ode to Book Bloggers

When I first decided to self-publish, I had a wonderful mentor of whom I asked, “Now what?” She sent me a link to a website of book bloggers and said, “Try to get some reviews.” How had I been a writer for so long and not known there were so many book bloggers in cyberspace?

I spent the next few weeks clicking on each site, reading the review policies and submitting my books for consideration. Let me first say I’m eternally grateful to book bloggers who have a Review Policy heading at the top or side of their blog. Also, some book bloggers don’t accept self-published books and I love it when this practice is clearly stated.

I’ve gotten about a forty percent positive response rate from reviewers. With each review acceptance the same thought kept coming back to me: who are these people and what motivates them to host a book blogging site? I’ve found the answer in their About Me page. Book bloggers are moms and dads, wives and husbands, daughters and sons, employees and stay-at-home parents, students and everyday people like you and me. The difference is, book bloggers take an incredible amount of their free time and give it away to others—both readers and authors.

I’ve exchanged friendly emails with some of the bloggers who have reviewed my books and I always thank them for their time (even when the reviews aren’t glowing) and Twitter and Facebook links to their sites. The truth is, I wish I could do more.

For years I’ve listened to writers complain about how they can’t find the time to write between their kids and their jobs and their spouses and their animals and their missing muse and so on. I’ve always wanted to say to these complainers, “If you really want to write, you’ll find a way to make it happen.”

I should direct complaining writers to the varied book blogging sites on the Internet. Writers don’t have time to write? How does so-and-so book blogger have time to read and review hundreds of books per year, maintain their site, conduct author interviews, host giveaways, feed their kids, spend time with their spouses and go to work every day?

As best I can figure, book bloggers blog because they love reading and sharing their love of books with others. They don’t expect an advance from a publisher or an appearance on the New York Times list or for someone to buy the movie rights to their work. Book bloggers read and share their opinions with others for the sheer pleasure of reading YOUR work. And they do it with grace and tact and appreciation.

In case you haven’t gotten the whole point of this post, I love book bloggers for the mere fact that they exist only to give something back. So thank you book bloggers for your time and consideration and even your acknowledgement that you received my request and can’t or won’t review my book. I love what you do, how you do it, and I know that if everyone behaved in the same selfless manner as book bloggers, the world would be a better place.