Sister To Sister We Will Always Be

The Girls In My FamilyThese are the women in my life: my mom, my sisters, my aunt, my sister-in-law and cousins-in-law. We are united in our bond as family members and even though we’re scattered around the country, we come together for weddings and funerals and various other family occasions. I love these women. They’re a part of who I was yesterday, who I am today, and who I’ll be tomorrow.

But in the world beyond my family, I’ve discovered another sisterhood, women with whom I’ve opened a vein and shared my innermost dreams and sorrows and joy. While men have always been vital to my life – as a teenager, I coveted my girlfriend’s four older brothers and wished I could exchange my sisters for them  – it’s only been in recent years that I’ve learned to truly appreciate the many women in my life.

When I look back, the sisterhood has always been there, from playing dress-up as a kid to playing Barbie in the empty lot next door. From sharing the angst of unrequited love to sharing the joy of bridal showers and wedding vows. From impending motherhood to exchanging distant – but never forgotten – memories of childbirth.

The sisterhood is all about relationships and families and womanly support. It’s my very own cheerleader squad which comes to the rescue when I need them the most. It’s the woman next door who lends me a cup of sugar so I don’t have to make a trip to the store. It’s the girlfriend who offers to babysit my toddler so I can take a break from being a mommy. It’s the co-worker who takes one look at me, realizes I’m having a horrific day and covers for me without question. It’s the writer-friend who gives me the honest critique I requested, then worries they’ve hurt my tender feelings.

Sheila Seabrook

This is my sisterhood, the special women in my life, who stand beside me no matter what.  Who are the special women in your life and what makes them so different from the men in your life?


About Sheila Seabrook

Author of contemporary romance and women's fiction.

Posted on August 10, 2011, in Blog Posts and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 27 Comments.

  1. Great post, Sheila.

    I agree that your family sisters–for me my mother and sister–are invaluable in our lives.

    My other sisters are my friends and neighbors who I know I can count on for anything. These are often stronger bonds because there isn’t blood connecting us, however these women are here for me no matter what. I’m losing the proximity of one of these sisters to a move, but I know our bond will continue.

    My sisters in writing provide so much support that the value of their friendship cannot be measured. Just writing this comment, I realize how blessed I am! Thanks for that reminder!

    • Hi Christy … I simply can’t imagine what it was like 50 years ago to stay in contact with the women in our lives. The absolutely best thing about the internet is how easy it is to keep in contact using email and Skype.

      Thanks for popping in!

  2. Sheila,

    I only have one sister and she lives on Vancouver Island so I don’t see her as often as I’d like. Although it wasn’t until she moved out of the house that we started to get along! I had 4 older brothers and used to wish I had 5 rather than a sister. But now that we’re older, we have such fun together. I think because we have so many of the same experiences, being wives, mothers, that she just gets me more.

    I have great relationships with men, but they don’t connect on the same level, don’t share their inner most thoughts and feelings the way women do.

    I treasure my aunts, sister, writer friends and daughters. Don’t know what I’d do without them!

    • Hi Michelle … I had two younger sisters, so I hear you. But it seems like once we all became adults, we’d shared enough experiences that age was no longer a factor. It’s great, isn’t it? 🙂

      Thanks for popping in!

  3. Sheila, you’re so fortunate to have a big family of supportive women. I have only a few close friends but I try to hold them close and keep up. So many of the important women in my life are other writers because they’re the only ones who truly understand about the voices in my head.

    • Hi Susan … I count myself lucky to be one of your long time writer friends. Our little group has shared happy moments and sad moments, both professionally and personally. The day we met was one of the best.

      Thanks for popping in!

  4. Lovely post, Sheila. I am close to my two older sisters and miss what I had with my three younger ones but due to some major family issues, I don’t have a relationship with them any longer. But I’ve found friendship with people through the internet, old friends as well as new, and they’re all women. The only male friends I have are – actually I have no male friends – acquaintances but no friends. I miss that and it’s been since college that I’ve had any. I love my male hair stylist who lives out of town and actually knows a lot about me, more than a lot of people.

    • Hi Patti … in my younger days, I tended to hang out with guys more than girls and I know I’ve missed out on long time female relationships because of it. But I’m making up for it now and meeting so many wonderful women like yourself.

      Special hugs to you today on the loss of your father-in-law. I know you’re extremely busy and want to thank you so much for taking the time to stop in and share.

      • Thank you, Sheila. Just got back from a LOOONG time with everyone at the memorial and then the reception. It had moments of crying and laughing and a lot of talking to people who I hadn’t seen in a while. Tomorrow we have to drive 2 hours south to Gustine to bury the ashes and that will be another long one. But it’s all good. Thank you for your kind words.

  5. Great post, Sheila!
    I don’t have any sisters…and no daughters, either, but I do have a close sisterhood with several women, some are writers, some family, and some longtime friends and well as a few new ones. I’ve kept in touch with my group of highschool girlfriends for lo these many years, and when we’re together, it’s like we’ve never been apart. The best part is knowing I can count on my sisters for love and support in good times and bad, and they know they can count on me. And I’m proud to say you are one of them!


    • Hi Linda … I’m so glad to be a part of your life. You are the instigator of our little group of online writing buddies and I can’t thank you enough for bringing us all together. Can you believe that we’ve been talking — almost daily — since 1999? Wow! 🙂

      Thanks for popping in!

  6. Hi, Sheila:

    I have 3 sisters and we are so tight. And it is way cool. They are my friends’ friends, too.

    And I have my writing sisterhood, one I’m happy to say you are a part of!

    • Hi Vicki … one of the coolest things about the internet is all of the wonderful women I’ve met without even leaving my home! Thank you for including me as part of your writing sisterhood.

      Thanks for popping in!

  7. Beautiful post! As I think back to the treasured memories I have with my sisters, and the many women friends I have had through time, I feel so lucky. There has always been a friend to laugh or cry with me or listen to my troubles, and I know that I have often done the same for them. Although we may have lost contact, with each one there is a special bond shared, and when I think of them, my heart smiles. I have learned so many life lessons through these wonderful women and continue to do so.
    There is a poem that I love by Brian A. “Drew” Chalker ‘Reason, Season or Lifetime’ that tells how people come in and out of our lives for a reason, season or lifetime.
    Take care, Jan Mitchell

    • Hi Jan … I love how you put that “my heart smiles”. And thank you for sharing a bit of the Chalker poem. It’s lovely and so very true.

      For those of you who don’t know, Jan is one of my three sisters. At our youngest sister’s wedding, the men in our family tagged us girls with the name “The Bobble-heads”. If you were to see us all together, you’d understand why. Lots of similarities in family mannerisms. 🙂

      Thanks for popping in!

  8. I’m always so jealous of women with sisters. I grew up with two brothers. My mother didn’t have sisters, either, so I always felt I was looking in from the outside on these precious relationships other women had. Over the years, I’ve had to make my own sisterhood: College friends and sorority sisters who are more like family; valued co-workers who were surrogate older sisters MANY times; a ‘sorority’ of dog walkers who became best friends; and now, my writing sisters who cheer me on in my efforts and inspire me with their own amazing craft. I wasn’t able to give my daughter the gift of sisterhood, but I hope I’ve shown her where to look!

    • Hi Tracy … like Michelle said in one of the comments above, men simply do not share intimately like women do. I don’t have any daughters to share the gift of sisterhood but I hope to one day have daughter-in-laws. And with any luck, they’ll love me enough to include me in their lives (as long as they stay away from the topic of sex!).

      Thanks for popping in!

  9. I loved this post, Sheila. I was one of those kids that craved an older sister, since I only had two older brothers. The differences between the sexes are real, they are wonderful and they are for us to enjoy.

    Girls who have lots of brothers learn early how fragile the male ego can be, how truly sensitive they are when pretending to be macho. Most chefs and clothes designers and the writers of love songs are afterall men. So I appreciate and love them …

    However, there is nothing quite like the bond we have with each other. I live in a retirement community and it is sooooo obvious which of the sexes are the stronger and the most durable. The men do not congregate in groups of chatty, loving companions to sew or swim or “do lunch.” Men live a more solitary life and widowers are a sad site.

    I love the women in my life and the joy the give to me and I often wish it were possible for the men I know to have the closeness we have since most of them are clueless as to “what the heck is that?”

    I told my daughter-in-law when she gave birth to boy-girl twins. Love them both, but just remember. When you give birth to a girl, you give birth to your best friend 🙂

    • Hi Ramlingsfromtheleft … you know, one of these days, you’re going to have to tell me your first name. 🙂

      I never gave any thought to widowers living a more solitary life. My grandma lost her husband when she was quite young (I never met my paternal grandfather) and she was always surrounded by women friends. I guess women tend to build stronger support networks because relationships are so important to us. We’re very fortunate to be women.

      Thanks for popping in!

  10. Hi, Sheila,
    I’m grateful for my
    sisters, daughters,
    mom, and women
    friends. Thanks for
    reminding me to
    cherish every
    minute with them.

    • Hi Pat … we get so busy with our daily lives that we forget how important these relationships are, don’t we? I find that the older I get, the more I dwell on their importance.

      Thanks for popping in!

  11. I have an older sister and a younger sister and thank God for both of them–

    But I agree, women form special bonds unlike men so in reality, we have sisters everywhere! 🙂 A good thing, because we women do like to talk, and vent, and share, and cry, and cheer, and–

    Well you get the point. (We do go on!) It’s a blessing we understand one another.

  12. Hello again Sheila: I know my name comes through either as Ramblings or fOIS In The City automatically.

    I am Florence Fois … not Flo so you know … just plain old Florence and it’s good to meet you. I am enjoying this blog and all of the various posts, as each of you have a different “slant.”

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