Channeling Bette Midler

I met with a friend today about his dream of writing a book. He’s an incredibly gifted physician who works with children and has one heck of a story to tell. As I walked him through some steps to take in order to make his dream a reality, I felt privileged to be able to help someone, no matter how small my contribution.

Sitting across the table from my friend and witnessing his eagerness to start something he’s always wanted to do made me feel so grateful that I took the leap and began living my dream of writing full time. I’m no where near finished with my journey, there is so much left to do and to learn, but I’m not back at the beginning where taking the first steps seemed so daunting.

I saw in his eyes what I’d seen in my own—desire, fear, apprehension—the kinds of emotions that back some people down and lift others up. I told him straight out that he had a lot of work to do and that it wouldn’t be easy. I wasn’t telling him anything he didn’t already know. A man who has worked as hard as he has and faces what he has to face every day isn’t the kind of person who’s going to back down because something is hard.

I feel like he took a real step forward today just by talking about his dream. Sometimes admitting something out loud to someone is the very thing to push a person toward his or her goal. It’s easy to walk away from a dream no one knows about but you. I wrote in secret for years and felt mortally embarrassed when either my husband or my kids told others I was writing a book. I didn’t want people asking me how it was going, when I was going to get published, when they could find my book on the shelves of the local bookstore. I was protecting my dream by not sharing it with others.

When I decided to self-publish my work, I had to let people know and in a very big way. Was I scared to put my work out there for others to judge? You better believe I was. I’m still a little bit scared. I had a very supportive group of friends who helped lift me up when I made this decision. I hope all the dreamers out there have at least one person who can make the road ahead a little less weary.

What about you? What’s your dream and who’s the wind beneath your wings?


About Christy Hayes

A wife, a mother and a writer of romantic women's fiction. I love dogs, exercise and cable news.

Posted on December 12, 2011, in Blog Posts and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 11 Comments.

  1. Great post, Christy! It’s easy to say you want to write a book–people say to me all the time. But, it takes a lot of passion to actually sit down and complete a manuscript. Then, it takes a lot of courage to put that manuscript out there for others to either embrace or obliterate. I’m so blessed to have a supportive family and friends to prop me up throughout this process. Thanks for being one of them!

  2. Christy, isn’t a miracle that we can finally say out loud to the world … I am a writer? Yes, it’s frightening and fraught with disappointments and hard times, but nothing else in my life has given me this much joy (except my two kids) and nothing will ever get into the soul of who I am.

    I look foward to reading you. I am so thankful I found this group and a connection to what I love in others who share my joy! Thanks 🙂

    • We’re glad you’re here, Florance! Yes, kids and an achievement all our own–what could be better?

  3. Oh, Christy, of course you’ve touched a chord in all of us writers. I remember telling people for the first time that I was going to write a book and everyone was so excited for me. But, in reality, they never asked whether I had actually done it. I think a lot of that has to do with SO many people who say the same thing. But we all know you have to be very, very diligent and REALLY want it to actually go for it – just like your friend. I’m betting he’ll write that book, and others as well, because he knows what it’s like to work hard to get what he wants.

  4. My dream is the bestseller lists. Wow, I can’t believe I’vve admitted this in a public forum. 🙂

    I have so many wonderful friends who support me. Mostly I have friends who cheer me on and friends who tell me to put my big girl panties on. Opposite sides of the fence, LOL! If we didn’t form groups like this, the writing life would be so much lonelier. I am so fortunate to have met so many wonderful people over the years.

    Christy, I hope you’ll share more of your friend’s writing progress as he moves forward into this big scary world.

    • Sheila,
      I’ll keep you posted with his pursuit with fingers crossed that he pulls the trigger! Thanks for being a part of my support group!

  5. Ditto (I have a closet writer friend myself!)and I always remind myself (and them) that the time will pass anyway. You can choose to do nothing or choose to go after the dream–the time will pass anyway–but when I take my last breath, I want to look back on my life and be able to say: at least I tried. “It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all” works for chasing dreams, too.

  6. Family and friends are my inspiration too! I find that my writing has connected me to friends from my past that I had lost track of. All of my writer friends are coming out of the woodwork, too and I have the opportunity to encourage them in their dream as well!

  7. Thanks for stopping by, Kate! Yes, it is nice to inspire and be inspired by our writer friends. Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and yours!

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