Daily Archives: October 4, 2013

Passwords: A Pain in the #%&!


            I’ve had it with passwords.   Seriously, I’m in password Hell right now.  Who came up with the idea of logins, usernames and stupid passwords, anyway?  I’d really like to slug that person.  Sorry, I’m a little twitchy because I promised my editor I’d pound out a 25k word novella this month without giving any thought to what I was actually going to write.  Yep, look up panster in the dictionary and my picture will be right there.

            Anyway, back to passwords.  It used to be, all you needed to know was simple 4-digit code to access your voice mail at work or at home.  I could never even keep those two straight and was forever deleting important work messages.  Nowadays, you need a password just to operate your phone.  Every transaction you make on the Internet requires you to set up a user name and password—even if it’s just a temporary one.  I totally get that these are necessary to keep my information secure, but, really, I’ve got so many floating around out there, any identity thief who hacks in will think I’m a certified schizophrenic.  Even worse are the security prompts a site gives you when you forget your password.  I swear one of them asked me the name of the first boy I kissed.passwords

            My brother, mister super-duper government security expert, told me once to never use the same password twice.  Like an idiot, I followed his advice and now have a plethora of passwords and I can’t remember which one goes with which account!  (Not that it matters to my computer geek little brother.  He can access my computer WITHOUT leaving his sofa in suburban DC.  So much for the diary with the lock and key.)

            “Keep a list on your phone,” he tells me.  And if I forget the password to unlock my phone?  The new iPhone has a component that reads your thumbprint to unlock it.  Cool.  Unless you live life like an episode of I Love Lucy like yours truly.  As soon as I programmed that bad boy to open only with my thumb print, I’d likely shear the tip off in a Sunday morning bagel slicing accident or burn the skin beyond recognition roasting a marshmallow. 

            No, I’m waiting for the retina display model phone and computer.  Scientists and grad students at Purdue University are working on this as I type.  They say they are only a couple of years away from rollout.  I say: hurry up!  In the meantime I’m still stuck in Password Hell trying to remember what my password is for Goodreads.  I initially set it up through Facebook, but now the folks at Facebook changed my account around (don’t ask) and I can’t get into Goodreads.  Never mind Twitter.  I have NO idea what my password is there or how to go about finding it. 

            I guess I have no choice but to stay off social media and write this dang novella.  Hmmm.  I’m sensing a conspiracy here.

            Is anyone else frustrated with passwords?  Do you have a system for keeping them organized?  Particularly one that wouldn’t stump Lucy?  Please share!

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